Interviews, Journalists, And The Police

David Myatt

David Myatt

From The Archives

Interviews, Journalists, The Police, and Pathei-Mathos
(pdf)

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Extract from the Editorial Preface:

The following autobiographical article by David Myatt was written in 2009 and revised in 2010. It was included as an Excursus in early (2009-2011) drafts of his autobiography Myngath, copies of which were circulated to a few friends, with the drafts briefly appearing on some internet blogs, to be replaced by the final and substantially revised version published in May 2013 which lacked this article.

The article provides Myatt’s side of the story in relation to the police, interviews, and journalists such as Nick Ryan who have written about Myatt in a propagandistic manner.

Four interesting things deserve mentioning in connection with the article. The first – and most curious – is that the journalist who, in 1974, “stitched Myatt up” by making allegations about animal sacrifice became ill shortly after his report was published in a local newspaper. He was diagnosed with a terminal disease, and died less than a year later, with the local rumour being that Anton Long’s then Leeds-based Temple of the Sun (an early O9A nexion) had undertaken The Death Ritual (qv. The ONA’s Black Book of Satan) and thus cursed that journalist […..]

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Related:

Myatt: A Matter Of Honour
(pdf)


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Selected O9A Articles, 2017

Atu XX

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A selection from the articles, relevant to the pagan and hermetic esotericism – and the practical ‘Dark Arts’ – of the Order of Nine Angles, that have been published in the past year.

O9A: Selected Articles, 2017
(pdf)

Contents:

° Preface
° Some Background To The O9A.
° Masculous And Muliebral: The Sinister Feminine And Homo Hubris.
° A Note Regarding The Sinister-Numinous Aesthetic Of The Order Of Nine Angles.
° On Native Egyptian Influence In The Corpus Hermeticum.
° Re-discovering Western Paganism.
° The Avenging Alastoras.
° On Sorcery In Virgil’s Aeneid.
° Some Thoughts Of Some Solitary Seeker.
° The Peculiar Matter Of Mr Myatt And Mr Long.
° It Can Sometimes Be Informative To Chastise.
° A Note Regarding The Term Numinous


Image Credit:

Richard Moult: Atu XX (Aeon) from Non Est Secundus Quia Unus Est,
a book of Tarot archetypes.


The Peculiar Matter Of Myatt And Long

Order of Nine Angles

O9A

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The Peculiar Matter Of Myatt And Long

For almost four decades The Peculiar Matter Of Myatt And Long has interested many of those interested in or curious about the modern Occult group the Order of Nine Angles, since in respect of the Order of Nine Angles whether or not Mr David Myatt is or was “Anton Long” is sui generis.

Sui generis because Anton Long not only devised the Occult philosophy and the praxises (such as the Seven Fold Way with its Insight Roles, Culling, Star Game, Esoteric Chant, Grade Ritual of Internet Adept, and physical challenges) that are – that presence – the Order of Nine Angles (O9A, ONA) but also authored nearly all of its texts from its inception in the early 1970s to his retirement, as the extant Magus of the O9A, in 2011 c.e. As one person associated with the O9A wrote:

“In modern occultism there are four main exponents of, and/or expositions of, what is often referred to as Left Hand Path, and/or Satanic, esotericism. These are Anton LaVey and the Church of Satan; Michael Aquino and the Temple of Set; Aleister Crowley and Thelema; and Anton Long and the Order of Nine Angles.

Whatever one’s opinion of the Church of Satan, the Temple of Set, Thelema, or the Order of Nine Angles, they all to great extent reflect the known and documented life, the personality, and the ideas or beliefs, of the person most associated with them and who first expounded, or who first effectively codified, the ideas/beliefs/praxis – or the esoteric philosophy – evident in them.” {1}

With several academics – from Goodrick-Clarke in 2003, to Senholt in 2012, to Introvigne in 2016 {2} – and others, from journalists to some of those associated with the O9A, writing that Anton Long was a pseudonym of David Myatt, it was natural that many people would believe that “the role of David Myatt was and is essential to the creation and existence of the ONA.” {3}

However, to date no one – including academics – has provided any evidence from primary sources {4} that Myatt is Anton Long or that Myatt wrote any of the thousands of ONA texts that form the ONA corpus.

In the case of Goodrick-Clarke, for example, he based his supposition on a work with the title Diablerie, a copy of which is in the British Library {5} and which consists of comb-bound photocopies of a typewritten text and which purports to be an account of the early life of Anton Long. While the account is superficially similar in some respects to the childhood Myatt recounted in his 1980s memoir Autobiographical Notes: Towards Identity and the Galactic Empire {6} – and subsequently in his 2013 autobiography Myngath {7} – there are discrepancies and errors, such as in details of abode and schooling, as well as many vainglorious boasts such as being a ‘cat-burglar’ and his Occult group holding a person prisoner for days before sacrificing them during a ritual. Which discrepancies and errors, and such vainglorious boasts, have led several of those associated with the O9A to declare it is a forgery {8}, a claim also made by Myatt himself who wrote, in respect of Goodrick-Clarke, that “the often fictitious account he gives of ‘my life’ during that time is almost entirely taken from the fictional Diablerie manuscript.” {9}

Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc And Other Fallacies

In a section of A Matter Of Honour sub-titled The Logical Fallacy of Incomplete Evidence – A Case Study, Myatt analyses in some detail the claims made by Senholt in his 2008 Master of Arts thesis, which thesis Senholt later revised for inclusion as a chapter in the book The Devil’s Party: Satanism in Modernity, edited by Per Faxneld and Jesper Aagaard Petersen and published by Oxford University Press in 2013.

Myatt writes:

“A reading of the thesis reveals two interesting things. First, the use of and reliance upon secondary and tertiary sources, many of which are anonymous and many of which are derived from ‘the world wide web’, that most unreliable source of information. For example, he relies on the book Black Sun by Goodrick-Clarke even after admitting it contains errors and that the author offers no proof for the assumptions made in respect of me and the ONA. Second, that Senholt, undoubtedly inadvertently, commits the logical fallacy of incomplete evidence. That is, the multitude of facts and circumstances which do not support his contention about me and the ONA are omitted.”

Myatt details the factual errors made by Senholt, provides logical explanations for the claims made by Senholt – such as the claim that since both Myatt and the ONA use the neo-nazi ‘year of the fuhrer’ calender and terms such as ‘aeonic’, there is a causal link between the two, post hoc ergo propter hoc – with Myatt then listing various facts about his own life which contradict the assumption that he is or was a Satanist, facts (and primary sources) such as his semi-autobiographical poetry, his published correspondence, his marriage in the 1990s in a Christian church, and his ethical philosophy of pathei-mathos, which “reveal the ideas and experiences and (importantly) the failings of someone so different from a satanist that they have to be ignored.”

According to Myatt:

“it is matter of honour. Of personal knowing. As I mentioned […] the traditional gentlemanly and ladylike virtues and their cultivation are no longer the standard which individuals are expected to aspire to and to uphold. Thus I do not expect the plethora of rumours and allegations about me to suddenly cease, although I admit I do and perhaps naively nurture a vague hope that what I have written here may cause a few individuals to reconsider the veracity of such rumours and allegations.”

Yet despite Myatt’s rebuttal and despite the lack of evidence from primary sources, Senholt’s thesis and the chapter based on it in the aforementioned book – together with the claims made about Myatt by Goodrick-Clarke and by others {10} – have been cited by academics and non-academics alike as “proof” that Myatt is Anton Long and founded and was involved with the ONA.

Which use of such sources is a classic example of argumentum ad verecundiam, of the fallacy of appeal to authority. That academics such as Massimo Introvigne – in his Satanism: A Social History published in 2016 by Brill, Leiden, as volume 21 in the series Texts and Studies in Western Esotericism – commit such a fallacy in respect of Myatt seems to confirm Myatt’s conclusion in his A Matter Of Honour essay

“that the research done by some modern authors and even some academics – whose works are published by reputable publishers or quoted by others engaged in academic research – is inadequate and does not meet the taxing criteria of scholarship.” {11}

For Introvigne – professor of Sociology of Religions at the Catholic Pontifical Salesian University, Torino – fallaciously wrote (i) that Goodrick-Clarke in his 2003 book Black Sun confirmed that Myatt was Anton Long, and (ii) that Senholt “offered a number of elements confirming that Long was indeed Myatt.” Fallacious because neither Goodrick-Clarke nor Senholt provided any evidence from primary sources, with their ‘circumstantial evidence’ based on non-evidentiary assumptions (as in Goodrick-Clarke assuming Myatt wrote Diablerie) or derived from fallacious reasoning (as in Senholt unintentionally committing the fallacies of incomplete evidence and post hoc ergo propter hoc).

The Authority Of Individual Judgment And The Fallacy Of Illicit Transference

Those interested in ‘The Peculiar Matter Of Myatt And Long’ sometimes commit another fallacy, that of illicit transference, by arguing from the particular to the general, as Massimo Introvigne does in his book by referencing one item and then stating, on the basis of that one item, that the ONA has “more or less acknowledged that Anton Long was a nom de plume of Myatt.” {12}

The item cited by Introvigne was the e-text A Modern Mage: Anton Long and The Order of Nine Angles, which was later published as a printed book under the title The Radical Philosophy of Anton Long. {13} The work contains an introduction – and several articles – by Mr R. Parker, who wrote in the introduction that

“in order for a person to fully understand and appreciate the Order of Nine Angles – and to thus know what being O9A means in the real world they should know about and understand the sinister-numinous life of Anton Long because the person behind that nom-de-guerre was David Myatt.”

It is fallacious to cite this work, and such a statement – or any such works or any such statements – as an acknowledgement by the ONA that Myatt is Anton Long because the Order of Nine Angles is a leaderless collective – or more correctly, “a movement, a subculture or perhaps metaculture that its adherents choose to embody or identify with” {14} – and thus has no central authority and no one person, or any persons, who can claim to represent or who can claim to speak or write on behalf of the ONA. Even the pseudonymous Anton Long never claimed such an authority, writing in the early 1990s that

“There is no acceptance of someone else’s authority […] I claim no authority, and my creations, profuse as they are, will in the end be accepted or rejected on the basis of whether they work. Satan forbid they should ever become ‘dogma’ or a matter of ‘faith’. I also expect to see them become transformed, by their own metamorphosis and that due to other individuals: changed, extended and probably ultimately transcended, may be even forgotten. They – like the individual I am at the moment – are only a stage, toward something else.” {15}

“You ask who has authority in the Order and what this authority represents. Basically, the only ‘authority’ is that which arises or developes because of experience […] I have no ‘authority’ in the real sense – I simply offer advice and guidance based on my own experience. I am still learning. What I teach is not ‘sacred’ – hopefully, it will be surpassed, refined, changed, when others discover and experience and attain.” {16}

Anton Long is referring to one of the founding principles or traditions of the Order of Nine Angles, ‘the way of practical deeds’, of individuals learning – via such means as the Seven Fold Way – from pathei-mathos, from their own experience, a principle which has become known as The Authority Of Individual Judgment.

In practice this principle means that anyone or any nexion or nexions self-identifying as ONA can only present their own personal views or opinions concerning the ONA, based as those may be on their own experience or learning. Hence when someone such as Mr R. Parker writes that the person behind the nom-de-guerre Anton Long “was David Myatt” they are only presenting – can only ever present – their own personal view or opinion. They are not presenting – can never present – the view or the policy of the Order of Nine Angles.

That some individuals interested in ‘The Peculiar Matter Of Myatt And Long’ do not understand this, and/or commit the fallacy illicit transference, is understandable. That an academic such as Introvigne does not understand this fundamental ONA principle reveals a lack of understanding of the Order of Nine Angles, a lack deriving from an inadequate knowledge of, a lack of scholarly research into, the Order of Nine Angles.

The Legend Of Anton Long

That no one, academics included, has provided any evidence from primary sources that Myatt is Anton Long is not unexpected since in regard to the milieu of modern Occultism attention and interest hitherto has been focused on the likes of Howard Levey, Michael Aquino, and Mr Crowley, and not on the Order of Nine Angles and Anton Long.

That – with perhaps one exception {17} – what little has been written and published by academics about The Peculiar Matter Of Myatt And Long, and about the Order of Nine Angles, contains basic errors {18} {19} and assumptions, with the authors committing various logical fallacies, is also unexpected, given the lack of scholarship – of extensive research using primary sources – in what are relatively new fields of study, that of Western esotericism in general and of modern Satanism in particular.

Consequently, given the importance, the uniqueness, of Anton Long in creating and developing O9A Occult philosophy and praxises he remains – factually – something of a mystery to those associating themselves with the O9A movement and to those academics interested in the O9A, with assumptions and conjectures about his identity, and fallacious reasoning, having served to create and to perpetuate stories about him. Which mystery, which assumptions and conjectures, and which stories, are advantageous to an esoteric movement.

Kerri Scott
2017

{1} R. Parker (2013). Anton Long and The Exeatic Quest for Gnosis. e-text.

Anton Long was the author of foundational O9A documents – primary sources – such as Naos, Hostia, The Deofel Quartet, The Culling Texts, and Enantiodromia: The Sinister Abyssal Nexion.

{2} (a) Goodrick-Clarke, Nicholas (2003). Black Sun: Aryan Cults, Esoteric Nazism, and the Politics of Identity. New York University Press. p.216; (b) Senholt, Jacob C. (2013). Secret Identities in the Sinister Tradition: Political Esotericism and the Convergence of Radical Islam, Satanism, and National Socialism in the Order of Nine Angles. “The Devil’s Party: Satanism in Modernity”. Per Faxneld and Jesper Aagaard Petersen (editors). Oxford: Oxford University Press. pp. 250–274; (c) Introvigne, Massimo (2016). Satanism: A Social History. Brill. p.357.

{3} Senholt, Jacob C. (2009). The Sinister Tradition. Conference paper presented at Satanism in the Modern World, Norwegian University of Science and Technology, Trondheim, 19-20th of November, 2009. p.16

{4} Primary sources include direct evidence such as original documents dating from the period under study, and accounts and works (written, verbal, published or unpublished) by such individuals whose life or whose writings or whose works form part of the research. In addition, if such sources – documents or accounts or writings – are in another language, then it is incumbent upon the scholar to have knowledge of that language and thus be able to translate such documents themselves, for a reliance upon the translations of others relegates such sources from the position of primary ones to secondary ones.

In respect of Myatt and his peregrinations, primary sources would include his own writings, including his autobiography Myngath; court transcripts of his criminal trials; interviews with police officers who have arrested and interviewed him under caution; documents concerning his early years in Africa and the Far East; documents relating to his time as a Catholic monk; documents relating to his conversion to Islam (such as his Testimony of Faith in Islam signed as it is by Hafiz Muhammad Tufail – Imam of the Jamia Masjid Ghousia – and by Qadi Abdur Sa’auf and dated 24 Jumada Al-Ula), documents and letters relating to his involvement with Column 88; and so on.

Some material by the anti-fascist group ‘Searchlight’ relating to Myatt can be found in the Searchlight Archive in the University of Northampton archive room (ID: SCH/01/Res). Most of the Myatt items are in Series 12, SCH/01/Res/BRI/12/004, which deals with Combat 18. Some other material, relating to Myatt’s National-Socialist Movement, is in Series 21 SCH/01/Res/BRI/21/002

{5} Long, Anton (c.1991). Diablerie: Revelations of a Satanist. The British Library. General Reference Collection Cup.711/742. BNB GB9219567; System number 012478777.

{6} Quotations from Myatt’s memoir were included in the pamphlet Cosmic Reich: The Life and Thoughts of David Myatt, published by Renaissance Press, New Zealand, in 1995. Some details of Myatt’s early life are described on p.216 of Jeffrey Kaplan’s Encyclopedia of White Power: A Sourcebook on the Radical Racist Right, published by Rowman & Littlefield, in 2000.

Similar details are given in issue #3, May 1998 edition of Column 88, the magazine published by Myatt’s National-Socialist Movement, with other details included in the 2001 internet article The Life and Times of David Myatt, a copy of which is archived at https://web.archive.org/web/20011121112831/http://www.geocities.com:80/davidmyatt/biog.html [Accessed November 2017]

Around 2002, Myatt himself issued a revised and updated version of his memoir – which included his years with Combat 18 in the 1990s – a copy of which is archived at https://web.archive.org/web/20030502034417/http://www.geocities.com:80/davidmyatt/notes1.html [Accessed November 2017]

{7} Myatt, David. (2013). Myngath. Some Recollections of a Wyrdful and Extremist Life. CreateSpace Publishing. ISBN 9781484110744.

{8} An example is the 2013 article A Skeptic Reviews Diablerie by R. Parker, a copy of which is available at https://regardingdavidmyatt.wordpress.com/2013/01/19/a-sceptics-review-of-diablerie/ [Accessed November 2017]

Parker writes that the ‘evil deeds’ done by Mr Long which are described in Diablerie “are lame or laughable or sound like the adventures of a frat boy.”

{9} Myatt, David. A Matter Of Honour. e-text, 2012. In the essay Myatt lists seven biographical errors made by Goodrick-Clarke. A pdf version of the essay is available on Myatt’s weblog at https://davidmyatt.wordpress.com/concerning-the-occult/ [Accessed November 2017]

Myatt also makes mention of another forgery, Bealuwes Gast, writing that it

“seems to have been recently written by someone, possibly for financial gain resulting from selling it at some silly price to collectors of rare Occult memorabilia. The bulk of this new fictional ‘autobiography’ consists of an early (now out of date) edition of Myngath to which various fictional autobiographical stories and ‘sinister’ incidents and diatribes have been added in line with what might be expected from a mythical ‘Anton Long’. Given that the majority of these autobiographical stories in this so-called Bealuwes Gast are quite risible and fanciful (and not fundamentally satanic at all), and given that the ‘sinister diatribes’ seem to have been cut-and-pasted from various internet articles attributed to those who over the years have used the nom-de-plume Anton Long, it seems unlikely that this forgery will ever be taken seriously by anyone. I mean – and to name just one risible example – who can take seriously a ‘clockwork orange cult’ and the wearing of white lab coats to boot.”

In regard to this other ‘autobiography of Anton Long’, qv. the 2014 article by R. Parker, Bealuwes Gast: A Study in Forgery, available at https://regardingdavidmyatt.wordpress.com/bealuwes-gast/ [Accessed November 2017]

{10} One of the fallacious claims often repeated, deriving as it does from Senholt, is that Myatt’s extremist adventures (neo-nazi followed by radical Muslim) were ONA Insight Roles and thus link Myatt to the ONA. It is fallacious since such Insight Roles, by definition, (i) only last between a year and eighteen months while Myatt’s neo-nazi adventures lasted thirty years (1968-1998) with his time as a radical Muslim lasting over ten years (1998-2009), and (ii) they are a task that a fairly new Occult initiate – an External Adept – is expected to undertake before moving on to the next stage of the ONA’s Seven Fold Way.

The task is outlined in such Anton Long authored texts as An Introduction to Insight Rôles, which is included in the 1460 page ONA compilation The Definitive Guide To The Order of Nine Angles: Theory and Praxises, seventh edition, 2015.

{11} In his essay Myatt mentions that the criteria of scholarship “is essentially two-fold: (i) of detailed, meticulous, unbiased research on and concerning a specific topic or topics or subject undertaken over a period of some considerable time, usually a year or more in duration, and of necessity involving primary source material; and (ii) a rational assessment of the knowledge acquired by such research, with such conclusions about the topic, topics, or subject therefore being not only the logical result of the cumulative scholarly learning so acquired but also possessing a certain gravitas.”

{12} Introvigne, op.cit. p. 358.

{13} While the printed book is no longer available, copies of the e-text are, at the time of writing, still available on certain websites.

{14} Monette, Connell (2013). Mysticism in the 21st Century. Sirius Academic Press. p.89.

{15} Letter to Michael Aquino, dated 20th October 1990 ev. The Satanic Letters of Stephen Brown. Volume 1. Thormynd Press, 1992.

{16} Letter to Miss Stockton, dated 19th June 1991 eh. The Satanic Letters of Stephen Brown. Volume 1.

{17} The one exception is arguably the chapter on the ONA in Monette’s Mysticism in the 21st Century, op.cit.

{18} Some of the basic errors made by Introvigne include the following: (i) “that Myatt joined Jordan’s British Movement in 1969,” when the correct date is 1968; (ii) that Myatt’s middle name is William, when it is Wulstan; (iii) that the ONA Black Mass “derived from Huysmans and the rituals of the Church of Satan” when there is no such derivation and no documentary evidence to support such a claim; and (iv) that the Temple of Set “perceived the competition [the ONA] as dangerous, particularly when in the late 1980s some members of the Temple of Set started considering themselves members of the ONA at the same time. In 1992, Aquino […] launched an internal purge, expelling from the Temple of Set those members who also wanted to remain in the ONA,” when – to our knowledge – there was no such purge and no documentary evidence to support such a claim.

{19} The article The Occult And Academia surveys some of the errors about the ONA and Myatt made in the 2016 book Children of Lucifer: The Origins of Modern Religious Satanism, written by Ruben Van Luijk. The article is available at https://regardingdavidmyatt.wordpress.com/more-unscholarly-research/ [Accessed November 2017]


Myatt, The Septenary Anados, And The Quest For Lapis Philosophicus

Order of Nine Angles

O9A

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The life of David Myatt is discussed in relation to the occult group the Order of Nine Angles (O9A/ONA), with particular reference to (i) the O9A’s hermetic ‘seven fold way,’ which is a decades-long personal quest for wisdom, and (ii) the O9A concepts of ‘the sinisterly-numinous’ and ‘aeonics’. It will be argued that Myatt’s strange, varied, and documented life is consistent with someone following that ‘seven fold way’; that Myatt – under the nom-de-plume Anton Long – is one of the most innovative of modern occultists and one of the few to attain the grade of Magus; and that the O9A itself has been consistently mis-understood by outsiders.

Myatt, The Septenary Anados, And The Quest For Lapis Philosophicus
(pdf)


Related:
Myatt: A Matter of Honour
(pdf)


Satanic Islamist?

David Myatt

David Myatt

David Myatt: Satanic Islamist?
(pdf)

Extract from the article:

We analyse here a representative sample of the claims, made some years ago about Myatt by an anonymous accuser in an internet published article, revealing as the analysis does the flaws in the sources used, the factual errors made, and how the accuser employs propagandistic methods in an obvious attempt to try and convince readers that his claims about Myatt are true or at least merit serious consideration […]

As for the Order of Nine Angles, they – being “a dangerous and extreme form of Satanism” – revel in not only such associations with someone whose exeatic life encompasses violence, terrorism, extremism, and crime, but also in the notoriety of “being bad” in the real world as the anonymous accuser certainly believes Myatt to be. In this respect, every accusation made against Myatt by the anonymous accuser, and by others, is kudos for the amoral ONA, enhancing their image, their reputation, as practitioners of evil in the real world.

Thus, the more they revile and seek to demonize Mr Myatt – based on the assumption that he is Anton Long – the more they hype the “dangerous and extreme” Order of Nine Angles as being evil.

Now, were they to accept Myatt as now being some reformed extremist, some modern mystic extolling the virtues of compassion, love, and humility, then the ONA might have something of an image problem given how so many seem to believe that, as Senholt wrote, “the role of David Myatt [is] paramount to the whole creation and existence of the ONA.”

That opponents of the ONA and of Myatt do not seem to understand this is most amusing, for us and our kind.


A Visit By Antoon Longbeard III

Glasgow University library: MS Hunter 374 fol.4r (Boethius Consolation of Philosophy)

 

Quidditas Independent School For Boys and Girls
Yarchester Hall
Much Startling
Wiltshire

10.vii.16

It is with great pleasure that we send out this end of year report to you, dear parents, marking as it does our first year as Head Lady Master of the school.

Following a most generous donation by a Middle Eastern gentleman – an alumnus of the school – who wishes to remain anonymous, we are pleased to announce that the Lower Sixth desert expedition to Gilf Kebir in search of the rock of Afsana will go ahead as planned as will the refurbishment of Quants Hall including the Shooting Range where new safety measures will be introduced following that unfortunate incident last term involving a year ten boarder and a senior member of the Sapphic Club and which club, despite a petition from members of the rival Devil’s Advocate Guild, has not been closed down. The club will mark its centenary in the forthcoming Michaelmas term by staging a musical production of Miss Settles play Beautiful Girls, Towards You My Thoughts Will Never Change. In more good news, Miss Settle will be continuing with her self-defence classes following the decision by the local Constabulary not to proceed with the charge against her of assault following her intervention in a fight between her girls and some interloping male townies at the local hostelry.

Toward the end of Trinity Term our former Headmaster, Antoon Longbeard III, paid us a visit intending to give a shortened version of his annual three-hour lecture to the Upper Sixth, Soliloquy On Aeonics With Reference To Acausal Time And The Arabic Alchemy Of Al-Andalus in preparation for which we scheduled an exeat weekend resulting in attendance being limited to the few pupils who could not get away in time, plus Janitor Plunge and Head Groundsman Miss Tree. Antoon Longbeard III, always a stickler for upholding the sterling tradition of former Headmasters, was afterwards spotted asleep leaning against Big Oak, on the boundary of the First Eleven cricket pitch, clutching an empty bottle of a 12 year old single malt. Later that evening Miss Tree discovered him wandering aimlessly around the pond in Much Startling village having singed his beard and Tweed jacket after overfilling his prized briar pipe. We wish him well in his retirement.

Finally, we are sad to report that former Head Boy, Sefton Dolittle, while pursuing his childhood ambition to own the Star of Southern Rhodesia diamond, was apprehended in the vaults of a well-known London jeweller and has now begun a seven year holiday at Her Majesty’s pleasure.

We remain yours truly,
Edonia Bracquet

Head Lady Master